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5 Signs that Your Relationship Has Reached a Breaking Point
One of the most difficult decisions we face is the moment at which we have to confront whether to stay or leave an intimate relationship that’s no longer working. The decision may be complicated by...
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How to Stop Yourself from Catastrophizing (Even Now)
The pandemic along with the disappearance of many of the routines that kept us grounded and helped us manage our anxiety have understandably put some of us into a mode where we’re unable to see...
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Toxic Childhood? How to Deal with People Who Minimize Your Experience
Not long ago, I got this message from someone on Facebook: “I don’t see why you tear your mother down in this public way. It’s very clear that your mother must have done something right because you...
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5 Hard-to-Spot Manipulations Narcissists Love
“How is it possible that I made excuses for how he treated me for years? Ten years to be exact. Am I just stupid? What’s wrong with me that I allowed him to use me like his personal doormat and I just...
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Unloving Mothers and the Many Faces of Body-Shaming
As I have often written, a mother’s face is the first mirror in which a daughter catches a glimpse of herself, and what is reflected there shapes her sense of self in myriad ways, many of them...
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Toxic Childhood? Do You Owe Your Kids Grandparents?
When I was writing The Daughter Detox Question & Answer Book: A GPS for Navigating Your Way Out of a Toxic Childhood, from which this post is adapted, I was struck by the variety of responses I got...
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Toxic Childhood? 6 Signs that You’re Beginning to Heal
Of all the questions I get from readers, there’s one I get nearly every day: “Why is this taking so long? Is healing even possible?” and other variations on the theme. The frustration is understandable...
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Why A Narcissist Plays the Victim: A Telltale Pattern
It’s only with 20/20 hindsight that this distinct behavior becomes clear to those who have had relationships with narcissists; of course, once you see it, it becomes impossible to unsee. For example,...
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Can a Narcissist Ever Change? Understanding What’s Involved
When I was collecting questions from readers for my book, The Daughter Detox Question & Answer Book: A GPS for Navigating Your Way Out of a Toxic Childhood, It’s not surprising that this question...
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Toxic Childhood? Do You Know How Much Emotional Baggage You’re Carrying?
One common theme that emerges from the stories I hear is that of women who leave their childhood homes and families of origin, certain that the past is behind them, only to find that they have managed...
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Unloved Daughters: Can a Father’s Love Outweigh a Mother’s Lack of Love?
That was a question numerous readers wanted answered as I was writing The Daughter Detox Question & Answer Book; most usually, they wanted to know whether or not one parent’s love could somehow...
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Do I Owe It to My Children to Stay in Contact with My Family of Origin?
This question surfaces for most unloved daughters, at one point or another, but most usually when efforts at setting boundaries or maintaining low contact with their mothers, fathers, or both have...
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Unloved Daughters: Are You Normalizing Toxic or Abusive Behavior?
It’s a sad truth that you might not even be aware that you’re reacting to abusive behavior in unhealthy ways, especially if you grew up around abusive people. As children, we assume that what goes on...
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3 Rituals to Help You and Your Family Navigate the Pandemic
Even though I’ve been writing about mother-daughter relationships and other psychological topics for twenty years, my very first books were about spirituality and spiritual practices, and the trying...
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Unloved Daughters: Dealing with Trust Issues in a Time of Vulnerability
Given the stress of the moment, it’s not surprising that childhood issues are being triggered. At the same time, with so many of us sequestered at home, it is a good time to think about those feelings...
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Unloved Daughters: Dealing with and Recognizing Shame
While not every daughter will feel ashamed, many do, and suffer silently. Shame emanates from being unloved (“I am deficient, damaged, or less than, which is why I am unloved”), believing what is said...
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Using Visualization to Calm Yourself and Manage Your Emotions (Even Now)
Many of us have difficulty managing our emotions in the best of times but the times we find ourselves in at the moment are difficult for everyone, no matter how emotionally intelligent we are. Calming...
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Toxic Childhood? 6 Ways to Declutter Your Thinking and Spring Forward to Healing
I’m a great believer in taking advantage of the energy that comes with a change of season, especially if you’ve been feeling stuck or listless, as so many people do in the dark of winter. If you’ve...
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Unloved Daughters and Toxic Dads: Seeing Mom’s Role
One of the questions offered up by readers of Daughter Detox and included in my book, The Daughter Detox Question & Answer Book, was this one: “My father was toxic but by only blaming him, am I...
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Relationships and Why How You Fight Matters More than Sex
Not long ago, I asked “Elaine” who just celebrated her thirty-fifth wedding anniversary and is still happy in her marriage what the secret was. This was her answer: “Listening. Paying attention to no...
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